I was having a little think to myself - Is writing about pasta salad boring ? I kind of decided it is, especially a post without photos - boring with knobs on. Why is it that I can't read cookbooks without photos, yet there's never any need for a photo in a work of fiction is there ? The story hooks you in, and keeps you there.
At the moment, I'm not feeling much like cooking, not good on a food blog is it ? lol. I've been having some major stresses, and the way it has manifested itself in me this time is that I'm having connection problems. Does that sound wierd ? I suppose it must be like a detatchment thing where it's really difficult to engage with things you normally do. You / I just can't face them. I've just read that back, and I've read stuff like that before and thought 'That's a load of rubbish!', but it's true. So there you go.
So, here is a list of the things I need to do, and the only way to describe how I feel is like a cross between being behind a plate-glass window looking out, or being covered in cling film, unable to escape through it. Weird uh ? It's certainly an odd feeling.
Ok, here's the list.
1) Phone my mom. Just to say 'Hi', nothing major, but she'll say 'How are you ?' and the answer's too long.
2) Visit my neighbour - She puts me down a lot - it's her way of being 'funny' - but at the moment it's not.
3) See my friend who has far greater troubles than mine, but I'm not in the mood for being sympathetic, or in the mood for making the effort.
So, at the moment, I'm coming home every night - ironing, doing the odd blog thing, not reading my cook books, doing the odd run, not cooking, not doing yoga.
It's CC's birthday on Saturday so I need to snap out of this, but it doesn't feel 'snap-out-able' at the moment, but don't get me wrong it's not that bad...
Just a little grey rain cloud hanging over my head.
:( Obviously I don't know what's eating you, but I think everyone is feeling a little 'bleurgh' right now. Easter is late, so it's been a long stretch since Christmas. I know I could definitely do with some time off.
ReplyDeleteAbout your list:
1. Well, mothers must be dealt with, but I understand. There are times when I find my own too much. Not because of her, but because I'm tired and can't be bothered to talk about things. I don't really talk about my work with her. This was tough to begin with, as she found it offensive but I work all day in the lab and don't want to explain to her why x, y or z is a problem.
2. Don't. Sometimes you just have to look after yourself, and someone raining on your parade is not healthy.
3. Perhaps the two of you could just get together and mope with a load of chocolate? Or do something nice together. I don't know what the issues are so don't want to suggest really inappropriate things.
The bottom line is that it really sounds as if you need to look after yourself, and not worry too much about other people right now. We all have to do this from time to time. Sometimes life is great and sometimes it's just about survival!
Aw... never a truer word was spoken Josiejo - thank you for your comments. Thankfully I have only 3 more work days and then I'm off until May - and I can't wait ! Doing no.3 with chocolate sounds good, it's more of a geography thing really, if she was on my doorstep I'd be there, but she's not so I just can't figure out the logistics at the moment. But I will !! PMA if you know what I mean ! x
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